Anyways, this is a story I wrote last year that I found. The theme was spring. I of course had to write something that includes death. I don’t think I’ve ever written something that doesn’t include death.
This is getting depressing.
They’re the people you hear about in books.
The people you forget truly exist.
The people you endlessly pity when you do think about them.
Until you become one.
In a way, I always was one.
Just not in the eyes of the law so I never thought of my situation in that way.
My mother was dead before I could open my eyes and my father became an alcoholic to deal with his grief.
I was forgotten.
My father drank so much it shouldn’t have been a surprise when I came home to find him dead three days before Christmas.
But it was.
I shouldn’t have been so sad about the loss of a man who never cared for me.
But I was.
I was shocked.
I was devastated.
I shouldn’t have cared.
I should have ran.
I should have been free.
Instead, I sat down on the floor beside his dead body and I cried.
I sat there until the paramedic and the police came.
They took his body and sent me to a children’s home.
When I was there I was alone and neglected.
Just like at home.
But today that changes.
It has been three months since my father died.
Today is March 20th.
The first day of spring.
The first day of my new life.
Today I get adopted.
Today I get a new start that sheds light into the image of the dead body that haunts my nightmares.
Before my grandmother died she would say that the first day of spring brings a new outlook on life.
I didn’t believe her.
But now I do.
Ever since I heard my new life would start on March 20th.
Spring is bringing new life to the earth and to me.
I sit in the office of the children’s home and a woman walks in.
She has red hair and green eyes.
Her eyes look kind.
She tells me her name is Layla.
She tells me she will take care of me.
She tells me I’m safe.
And I believe her.
Because with spring comes a dangerous sense of security.
One that took any negative feeling I have about the world and turned them into trust.
Trust in the universe.
Trust in Layla.
Trust in myself.
I think spring is my favourite season.
I probably should put this up in spring, but you know what? It doesn’t really matter, does it?
Speaking of seasonal things, in December I will give you extra special Christmassy stuff. (Is Christmassy a word?) Anyways, I’ll try to do at least two posts a week in December.